Thinking Ahead

My dad is an entrepreneur whom I respect greatly. I've spent most of my life working for small businesses run by intelligent, motivated people. My stint in a larger corporation was interesting, but not exactly inspiring.

I've always said that as much as I respect the entrepreneur ethic and lifestyle, I didn't want to join them. It's too much work, too much commitment, too much responsibility. I said I'd rather just toe the corporate line and take my check home than be so consumed by my work.

Problem: I am my father's daughter. I am strong, independent, and highly motivated. I am energized by things that challenge me. I am frustrated by the limitations of the system that is already in place. I want to try and do better. Maybe I'll succeed. Maybe I'll fail. I won't know until I find out.

It's scary to stand at the edge and look into the void beyond the material safety of paid labor. It's also exciting. It's time to get the pieces in place to strike out on my own.

Come what may.

Bittersweet

As time goes by, I feel like I'm beginning to understand phrases that used to just be words strung together.

"My cup is full" sums up how I feel about life right now.

It's not that life is all roses--it's that I can see progress on things that I have worked on. My writing is coming along well. I'm growing and changing as a person.

My cup is equal parts full of heartbreak and joy. Instead of rail against the heartbreak, I'm learning to embrace both with gratitude. The heartbreak teaches me just how dear the joy really is.